Friday, July 15, 2011

You're Doing WHAT???

There are a lot of reactions people have when they find out you have, or are going to have, a "boob job." I'm sure a lot of women have had a very difficult time coming to the point that they could go ahead and have the procedure done due to fears of what everyone would think of them. Contrary to popular belief, the pressure is to not get surgery. No one is running around demanding that everyone have amazingly huge and perfect breasts. Even if you have had physical changes to your body that make you very uncomfortable with yourself, people will push you to just be happy with you and who you are. While that is all well and good (and sound advice in many instances), most of the people who are telling you that haven't actually seen what it is that you're not happy with. I can guarantee you that every single person that has protested my decision has never, and I mean NEVER, seen my breasts. For all they know I could have a pair of tube-socks rolled up and stuffed into my shirt.

The first person I told I was really going to go through with it was actually one of the people I first lived with when I moved back to California. He happened to text me while I was researching surgeons. (My Evil Bookend was actually the first person I talked to about it, but she lives a few states away). He was really awesome about it and told me to go for it if I felt it would make me happy. He likes boobs too. Not all guys do. Most of the discussions I've had about boobs generally involve men preferring smaller boobs. Although, a good friend of mine's husband described it as a textural thing. He doesn't like big boobs because they're so fatty. I can understand that, small boobs are somewhat firm (most of the time). Firmness is almost a thing of the past when they've changed shape four or five times. Then you can start discussing elasticity and the lack thereof. You can also learn the "joys" of having small, but saggy boobs. Two things that you'd never think would be combined. *deep sighs*

While researching surgeons and facilities I made a post on my FB account about the fact that I could (and probably would) totally buy boobs for 4k. (I wasn't really going to go for the cheapest surgeon I could find, but the surgeon that had been recommended to me was having a special). There were over 70 responses on that thread. Most of the men stated it was a horrible idea. A large portion of the women were incredibly supportive and some stated they would do it if they could afford it. A few of my friends already have done it and stated they loved the results and if they went back in time they'd do it again. They also offered their opinions on the different types and what they preferred and had experienced. A couple women thought it was a crumby idea. One of my favorite people (and the one girl down here that knew me when I was full-sized) was sweet about it and told me it was "like I was cheating" because I was already "so pretty". That was actually very flattering. She's happily married so I know it's not because she wants to flirt with all the boys, she's just ridiculously honest and blunt. I like that in a person. You don't have to agree with me, just say what you actually mean.

I told my mother yesterday and her response was something along the lines of, "Oh good. I know you've always wanted them. You should get a nice C." My mom's a hippy by the way. She delivered all her children naturally with no pain killers, sings folk music, and you wouldn't look at her and think she'd be so supportive of something like that. Not that she's running around with a flower garland headband and living in a tent (anymore), but she seems pretty granola if you know what I mean. But that's just how my family is. One of my sisters has also fixed the deflated boob issue and while we all teased her about it, I definitely didn't see anything wrong with it. After all, she wasn't doing anything to my boobs, so what did it really matter?

Overall, I've gotten an overwhelmingly positive response from people. I did have to tell one person to please stop talking to me about it because he was bothering me and it really wasn't his decision. I love him dearly but he was acting like I was going to a back-alley surgeon to be cut up with a rusty scalpel. Another person I don't remember ever meeting kept e-mailing me the most random comments. He'd added me on FB and I assumed we'd met at least once but I just wasn't placing him. But I really don't think we have. He e-mailed me not to go too big. I told him I merely wanted shape, to which he seemed fine with, until two hours later he e-mailed me to beg me to think of my back as he knew a few well-endowed women with back problems. He then went on to suggest I wear a weighted bra for a couple weeks to see how it felt. I didn't even know who this guy was and he was assuming I wanted to get an H cup or something. Good Lord!

Why are these people e-mailing me about this anyway you ask? Well... I did put it on FB. I figured it would just be better to deal with it now and get it out of the way so we can all move on.

All this noise about my impending set of tits made me start thinking about a bigger picture than just me and my future boobs. If people are willing to say these sorts of things to me, the chick that sits around and talks about wanting boobs on a weekly basis, what do they say to other women when they're considering surgery? I'm pretty open, and really couldn't give a shit about what people think about me and my bustline. I like boobs and I want my boobs to be pretty, not saggy. But in the bigger picture, there's a lot of stuff that goes into this decision. It's already an emotionally charged decision, and women that are feeling sensitive and concerned over the surgery must feel incredibly pressured. They're hearing about how they're mutilating themselves because of "societies standards." They feel judged, they feel even more insecure about themselves than you could possibly imagine, and they're being made to think that by trying to do something to help themselves feel "feminine" or "pretty" they are going to get an unending stream of bullshit from everyone around them.  

When I spoke to the patient care coordinator I was somewhat confused with why she told me she thought it was so great that I called, blah blah blah. I initially thought that was standard with just trying to get me to buy tits. But then, thinking about how the last few days had been, I came to the conclusion that women are freaked out when they call these offices. The patient care coordinators aren't just trying to get you to buy boobs or noses or whatever else you're thinking about, they're trying to allow you to feel "okay" about the decision you made. It seems like the standard response to, "I'm going to have augmentation done on my breasts" is, "did you think about it?" I spent years thinking about this. I'm pretty sure every woman that's bought boobs put a lot of thought into it! Do you really believe we were just walking down the street one day and decided, "I think I'd like to buy a set of boobs today." We research surgeons, we look at costs, we read effing Yelp reviews for fuck's sake!

This whole experience has been incredibly interesting so far. The next step is the initial consult. My appointment is next Thursday and I am very excited to meet my surgeon and see what he thinks is appropriate.


  1. Good luck! I am excited for you to be doing this for yourself. Like most less-endowed women, I've occasionally thought about getting a boob job. I think if I had less firm boobs or had previously had larger ones that decreased when I lost weight (I went down from almost a B to a firm A lol, so not too much of a difference) I might have ended up on the side of getting breast augmentation. It's amazing how little things (or not so little depending on your perspective) about our bodies can bug us. I'd love to have cleavage, but am more bothered by the 1/4 cup size difference between my small breasts. And the scar I have from having a biopsy. Things that even guys when they look at my breasts have to have pointed out to notice. Due to my innate practicality, desire to not spend money, and wanting to be able to get whacked in the chest without worrying about damaging expensive goods, I've decided to forgo such things, at least for now, but I look forward to hearing how it goes for you.

  2. "There is no such thing as natural beauty." - Truvy, "Steel Magnolias"